Labradoodle & Goldendoodle Forum
I've been sort of watching several rescue sites lately for a small, female, mini goldendoodle. Not for myself, but a friend. I've just sort of come to feel that the majority of the doodles in rescue are males and I'm wondering if (1) others see this same trend and (2) why? In discussions we have had about male/female, it seems the majority of people feel the males are more loving and cuddly than females and it seems odd that more of them would end up in rescue. Any thoughts?
There's no question that females are in higher demand among people who are looking to adopt a doodle. I approve all membership requests on the DRC site as well as respond to all messages on the DRC FB page, and overwhelmingly, people are looking for females. (In fact, people are looking for small female mini-goldendoodles more than anything else, lol. Your friend may have a long wait.)
I have my own theories about why females are preferred, which might insult some people if I give them here, lol. Let me just say that a lot of the people looking for females are would-be first-time owners.
Hey now, I have some totally non-legitimate reasons for preferring females and I know it!
You know, I creep on a few breeders and I feel like overwhelmingly their litters are heavier on the males (and yes, the females are the first to go.) It would be interesting to compile some statistics to show what the male/female birth ratio is. Biologically it makes more sense to me for there to be more females, because one male can impregnate all the females. But from my very nonscientific internet browsing, that doesn't seem to be the case.
I don't think it's that different from human babies. Arguably, it can be said that little boys are more affectionate and loving toward their mothers, but I can't tell you how many women want to have little girls to dress in ribbons and bows, take them to the salon, and make into their own little mini-me's. And lots of men want sons to play baseball with. Since I would hypothesize that the vast majority of the people on doodle kisses are women, it makes sense to me that they are looking for female dogs. I know my girls won't actually turn into daughters, but there's still something psychological about my girl squad. Logically it makes no sense. But I think most of us aren't logical. At least not all the time.
It's funny you posted this now, because I've been thinking that the dogs in all of the classes that I attended with JD and now with Jasper are overwhelmingly male. I'm wondering about that, too.
I think that I prefer females because that is what I grew up with. However, I often been heard to say the reason I chose to never have children is because I'd end up with a boy.
I grew up with females also, and my first two dogs were females because that's what I was used to and thought I preferred. Then came Jackdoodle. I'm now and forever a convert, lol.
And I can also say that Jasper is much much more affectionate, sweeter, and way more biddable than my last Mini Poodle, who was female. But also, different bloodlines, and we know all dogs have different temperaments, so take that with a grain of salt. Although, the wildest, most stubborn, most difficult pup in Jasper's litter was a female, followed by another female, lol, and those two remain the "tough cookies" of the litter as adults.
It is an interesting thought. I was raised with more female than male dogs, but the males were wonderful in every way. When I got my first dog as an adult, I think I requested a female, but I'm not even sure - I do know I ended up with a female and we loved her dearly. ALL of the dogs since have been males and not by specific choice - it just happened that as puppies purchased, the males were the best fit for us and when rescuing the males were what we found. I really have no preference as for sex, but I do have a preference in personality. I think when you rescue you need to forget the sex of the dog. Taking an informal count of the dogs I've kept records on when volunteering for a rescue, the majority have been male.
Karen...I can totally agree with you. I always had females growing up. When I got married, we got a female Golden Retriever and she was great. After she passed, we got a female Cockerpoo (Kasey). We really loved her but we referred to her at "Catdog". She was very independent and not very cuddly. After my husband suffered a devastating accident, iwe were looking for an ESA for him and Kasey just did not fit the mold so we decided on an ALD. My breeder convinced me to allow HER to choose our pup based on what personality we were looking for in a dog. When she chose Oliver, we were a bit hesitant on a male because of what we were just "used to", however she was spot on with Oliver. He is just what my hubby needed. He is loving, soulful, cuddly and will do anything just to please. Kasey was a bit bossy and Oliver never challenged her. After Kasey passed and Oliver was 4, we decided it we wanted to add another ALD to our family. We decided on a female, thinking having one of each would work out better so our only request to the breeder was a smaller female. Oliver is about 40 lbs. Along came Ivy. She quickly became the bossy little sister! She stole Oliver's toys, nipped at his feet, hung from his ears and swung from his tail. She is sweet and quirky and like Kasey, very independent. She is 4 and Oliver is 8. She is still the boss and it works with Oliver, he just allows her to be. I will have to admit, we love both Oliver and Ivy dearly but way down the road when it is time for another, I'm pretty sure my choice will be another boy. My daughter is getting her little boy from my breeder on June 11th. Can't wait!!!
See, I think it's so interesting the way our experiences shape our perception. I had the exact opposite experience. My first dog was a male. And he was so not my dog. We had a perfectly fine relationship, but his real love was my dad and tennis balls. Cuddle was not in his vocabulary. The female I got a few years later did nothing but sit on my lap and adore me. I'm pretty sure that influenced the way I feel about the sexes.
Luna was a cuddle bug for sure but did not like full body contact just rubs. My previous dog (a bichon) was very catlike and just liked to hang out in the same room. Riley is a full body kind of cuddler (super awkward due to her size lol) but she is also a lot more independent minded than Luna was and always seems to have her own "agenda". Luna's agenda was just always our agenda lol. Never had a male dog.
For me, it's not so much about the cuddling. I'm not the touchy-feeliest type of person myself. Most of the time, I like my space. I like a dog to be near me, but I'm fine if they aren't on top of me, lol.
Jasper sleeps in my bed, and he's usually up against me, but not smothering me. My female Mini wouldn't even sleep in my room, let alone my bed.
For me, it's about willingness to please, and less attitude. Girls are smarter than boys across the board; we all know that, lol. You know that saying "Everything I Need to Know, I Learned in Kindergarten: Boys Are Dumb"? Well, dumber is easier. Smarter often comes with an attitude of "I don't know if I feel like doing that right now." And Smart will make you prove that you're worthy of being loved. Dumb just loves you anyway.